after a day of calibration, it feels like a holiday again, as all the smiles on the streets blend into one sunny show of teeth; the question marks come back stronger after a long while of mindless running to avoid them, & i dread them now. summer is coming though, & the wine hasn't changed, & in fact nothing ever changes & i'm waiting for the past to recycle. we're all floating anyway, swimming our circles around pretty afternoon light, i'm waiting for it to get lazier so i can plunge into it all; sometimes the surface is just too tense, & i want to feel what's underneath.

midsommar was everything; & feels